Sunday, December 10, 2006

2006 SUCKED!!!

2006 Sucked.

A few of the lowlights:

At the end of last year, my grandmother died. At the beginning of this year, my dad had a heart attack, followed by two surgeries. Then, my young son's first pet, a fish, died. So much death around me.

A couple of weeks later, I went to the doctor who was surprised I hadn't already had a stroke due to several medical conditions. He said that if things didn't change drastically, I was going to die, and sooner rather than later. Scared the crap outta me. I've made a lot of drastic changes in my life in the last few months. It hasn't been fun, but if I want to be around for my family, I gotta do what I gotta do.

Spent all that time photographing movies posters I had for sale and didn't sell a single one.

I cancelled my trip to the San Jose Fangoria Weekend of Horrors.

Found out that Heather Storm, who was in my movie UNDERBELLY had a role in NATIONAL LAMPOON'S DORM DAZE 2. Good for her. Unfortunately, I've yet to see a dime from Vista Street Entertainment for UNDERBELLY.

To top it off, Don Dohler, he of THE ALIEN FACTOR fame, a really nice guy and a big inspiration to me, died this month of lung and brain cancer.

A whole bunch of other crap went on this year that I don't even want to get into here. This is primarily a movie blog, so here's the status on the movies I still have on my plate:

TWISTED FATES: "New Neighbor" segment of is still not totally complete - still needs a bit of music. Robert J.Olin is set to direct the "Welcome Sister" segment in spring 2007. I still need to shoot more stuff, but am unsure of when I can pull it together.

DEADLY PREMONITIONS: I made a trailer, but that's as far as I've gotten. Special effects for Link Masters anchorman footage has been cancelled - going to reshoot.

DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES: After hiring him to do so about two years ago, Tom Shaffer was finally going to shoot the TREESPIRIT segment a few weeks ago, but his lead actress was a no-show, so shoot was cancelled. The girl I'd hired to direct and star in a vampire segment at the beginning of the year completely flaked out, not only keeping my meager production funds and custom-made prop, but deciding she wanted to live as a man. I'm not kidding. Still working on the mummy costume.

Let's take a look back at my New Year's Resolutions 2006, shall we?


HA! Nope.

"2) Publish an issue of Dr. Squid"

HA HA! Nope.

"3) Go to the June Fango Con in Burbank"

HA HA HA! Nope.

"4) Finish my CREATURE FROM BEYOND script as well as at least one of the other scripts I have half-started all over the place"

HA HA HA HA! Nope.

"I've got other hopes for the year, including losing 50 pounds, paying off my credit cards, and other stuff"

Well, I have lost almost 20 pounds and we did pay off all of our credit cards.

So, I am more than glad that 2006 is almost over. 2007 better be a better year, or I'm going to kill somebody!!!

Resolutions for 2007? Do I dare tempt fate? I think not.

Tell those you love that you love them. Tell them now.

God bless.

On to 2007...

Friday, December 08, 2006

Old Monster Pics

Well, there not THAT old, but they're not new. Just found one of those disposible cameras and look what was on it!

This is the "skull" for TARPO, carved out of a glued-together assembly of styrofoam packing things I got from the computer department where I work.

I used a pair of superballs purchased at The Dollar Store for the eyeballs.

Here is my son wearing the finished costume. I covered the skull with green plastic tarp material, attaching it with a bunch of glue, duct tape and staples. The body was made by cutting out a body outline from two sheets of tarp, stapling and duct-taping the edges and turning it inside out, plus adding a bunch of tarp strips to look like seaweed. I cut up some plastic jump ropes I bought at The Dollar Store to make the "tongues" that come out of TARPO's head.

Here is my son modelling one of the hands I bought for the TREESPIRIT monster

Here is the UNDERBUG before we painted it.

Here is my son with the finished UNDERBUG.

Monday, December 04, 2006

All Work Is Making Me A Dull Boy!

I've got a major project at work going on and have been bringing parts of it home to make sure it is done on time. As such, movie stuff is screaming for attention from it's current location on the back burner.

Tom Shaffer did report that his actress was a no-show on Sunday, so he's re-casting the lead. More news when it comes in.

Got one of those disposable cameras developed and there were a bunch of pics from early work on the Underbug and Tarpo monsters for DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES. Will post when I have a moment.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Don Doher, 1946-2006

My friend John called me this afternoon to pass along the sad news that Baltimore filmmaker Don Dohler had lost his battle with cancer this morning. He was 60.

John and I were both in middle school when we seperately caught Don's movie THE ALIEN FACTOR on the channel 12 afternoon movie. The movie was a huge inspiration for us both and got us interested in making our own movies. The picture above is Don inside an alien outfit from the movie.

It impacted me for a number of reasons. I had moved all the way across the country from New Jersey a year or two earlier. To sit in my living room and watch this movie populated with characters who had accents like mine, who tromped around in woods like those around my old house, was almost like hearing from old friends. Of course the fact that I was around 12 and the movie was filled with all sorts of weird alien monsters made an impact as well!

My dad had a super-8 camera and had made stop-motion movies with his brother. I had made a couple of stop motion things with it as well and remember planning my own ALIEN FACTOR-inspired movie complete with storyboards and special effects notes. I had forced-perspective stuff planned and location-scouted up in the hills and woods behind my house. I never did get that project off the ground, but years later John got a VHS video camera for Christmas. The next thing you know, he and I and Rob Merickel had made STARCHASERS, a sci-fi chase movie shot in and around my house and clearly inspired by Don's ALIEN FACTOR flick.

Sometime back in the mid-80's, I think, TBS aired THE ALIEN FACTOR and I got it recorded on tape. That VHS tape was gold to me for I'd never seen the movie any other time and had never seen it available in video stores where I lived. At the end of the movie, in the end credits crawl, there was an address for the company that made the movie. I wrote to them, telling them how cool the movie was. Unfortunately the address was no longer good and the letter was returned to me. Rats.

Even more years later, I was out of college, working a regular 8-5 job and co-owner of a comic book and game store. I found an ad in a magazine for Don's Movie Club Magazine. I was self-publishing a photocopied zine at the time, Dr. Squid. I wrote to Don in hopes that he would do an interview by mail for my next issue - this was before I was really on the internet. To my pleasant surprise, Don not only wrote back but answered my questions with great detail. He unfortunately seemed a bit bitter about ever getting back into making movies, as he'd been burned by many distributors.

As time went on I moved from publishing a zine reviewing and about b-movies, to making my own. Don also ventured back due to the advent of digital video and partnered with Joe Ripple to form Timwarp Films.

Fred Olen Ray put out THE ALIEN FACTOR on DVD through his Retromedia label. Sweet.

Don and I corresponded via e-mail and I did a couple of interviews with him for websites and genre publications. He was always nice, supportive and seemed happy to share stories about his work.

I'll be watching THE ALIEN FACTOR tonight in honor of Don.

May he rest in peace.

This is a shot of Don in his basement where they built a set for the Sheriff's office for THE ALIEN FACTOR. I've always thought this was a cool shot - Don, surrounded by the movie world that he, literally, built.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Gobble Gobble

Had a good Thanksgiving. Lots of be thankful for.

I've decided that I'm not going to the Fanogria Weekend of Horrors in San Jose in Janaury. It's just not good timing right now for a number of reasons. I do plan to try for the Burbank Fango Con in June. We'll see...

Watched a movie called ANGEL BLADE the other day which featured Heather Storm in a tiny role of a prostitute who gets murdered. Heather was in my movie UNDERBELLY and I recently found out she's featured in NATIONAL LAMPOON'S DORM DAZE 2.

DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES: Tom Shaffer plans to start shooting the "TreeSpirit" segment this coming weekend.

DRACULA'S ACCOUNTANT: I actually wrote up about 3 pages of this the other day. Crazy!

DO-OVERS: I'm working on a couple of re-edits of some of my old movies for a possible re-packaging kind of thing. Shooting of some new or replacement footage is going to be necessary. To that end I spent Sunday afternoon with Tom Shaffer and Dee Alsman shooting some scenes. Both are troopers, gave great performances and I think we all had a fine time. Details when the time is right.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Everybody's Working for the Weekend

DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES: Tom Shaffer called and let me know that Crystal Boboluchii (pictured below) is lined up for the lead in the "TreeSpirit" segment. Sweet.

Lining up a couple shoots in the next few weeks - basically reshoot/pick-up kind of stuff for a couple of projects I'm not quite ready to talk about yet.

Hope to get a ton of stuff done this weekend. Fingers crossed!

Dracula's Accountant

In the "I can't help myself" department, I had an idea for a new script the other night and started jotting notes down about it. Here's the title: DRACULA'S ACCOUNTANT. Man, I'm nuts!

I got DORM DAZE 2 last night from Netflix and started watching it. Heather Storm is actually in it quite a bit, although she appears to have no lines. Still odd to see someone I worked with (in UNDERBELLY) in a "real" movie!

TWISTED FATES: Made a nifty theme in Garage Band for the "New Neighbor" segment. Still more music to put together.

DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES: Just about done writing the segment about the guy who turns into a bug monster on a blind date. Was planning to work in a zillion bug-themed phrases like "ants int he pants" and "bugging out" and such, and I did get a handful worked in, but it would seem a bit too goofy to cram in anny more than I have. Next up is finishing this script and working on a mask. I've got the concept in my head, just need to do some sketches and start building it.

DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES: Talked to Tom Shaffer yesterday and he's already got someone lined up to play the "Treespirit" monster - someone about 7 feet tall! He's also got call in to three other people for the cast, so things are moving along!

Dare I say I feel a bit of momentum on these various projects, so I hope I can keep it up.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Heather Storm

Thanks to a tip-off from my buddy John Bowker, I just found out that Heather Storm, one of the actresses from my flick UNDERBELLY, is in NATIONAL LAMPOON'S DORM DAZE 2! Just a few years back she was a college student acting in a shot-on-video b-movie in some guy's mother-in-law's house, and now look at her!


UPDATE: Heather Storm is also the new co-host of GARAGE SQUAD on the VELOCITY channel!

Underbelly from Joe Sherlock on Vimeo.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Bit o' Script Work

Finished the rewrite on the TREESPIRIT segment of DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES and sent it over to Tom Shaffer. While I still have several proejcts to edit before I'd even get to that one, it feels good to have it back in Tom's court.

I also worked more on a script for a segment about a guy who turns into a fly monster while on a blind date. Thinking this will go in instead of the vampire story. Have talked to an actor and actress about it and they we interested, but need to get the script finished to follow-up.

Saw a local theatrical production of Dracula tonight. Frequent F&C actor and effect man Rob Merickel did the make-up and special effects. It was way cool including some hot Dracula's brides and a great-looking cross that bursts into flame.

Back to the grind tomorrow...

On to music

Finished editing and "The New Neighbor" clocks in at 15:38. Have dropped in some music I'd made in Garage Band for the DEADLY PREMONITIONS trailer, but need to create some more specifically for this.

Saturday, November 11, 2006


Up to 14:04:05 on The New Neighbor....

I'm Back.

I'm back. The Dr. Squid site is back up. There are still a few pages that need work and there are a few sections I hope to add in the future, but for now, I'm back on the web.

Here are a few updates:

TWISTED FATES: I'm just a few minutes' worth of running time away from finishing the initial edit on the "New Neighbor" segment. Next up will be sound effects and music.

Robert J. Olin, who has acted in a number of f&c Productions like Underbelly and Bloodsucking Redneck Vampires, is set to direct the "Welcome Sister" segment in the spring of 2007. Robert reports that he already has three of the needed five actresses committed.

Judging from the near-15-minute runing time of "New Neighbor" and looking at the script length of my other segments, I may need to add one morre story. I have the plot worked out and will be working on the script in the coming months. I would likely be next summer before I'd be able to shoot it.

DEADLY PREMONITIONS: I cut a trailer together a few weeks back for Tough Tom Stedham to show at an event in Alabama. Speaking of Tom, check him out at

DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES: I'm just about done with a rewrite on the Treespirit script for Tom Shaffer to shoot. The vampire segment I'd hired someone to shoot fell apart in ways I could never have imagined (the girl I hired to direct it and play the "hot vampire chick" didn't do a thing with it for six months. Oh, and she also decided she wanted to live as a man. I'm not kidding) and frankly, I'm thinking that vampires are just not monsterous enough to include in the project anyway.

STILL AVAILABLE: Don't forget - Trailer Park Double Wide Trilogy of Terror - Six Schlocky Tales of Terror is available on DVD-R from

NETFLIX: You can currently rent BLOODSUCKING REDNECK VAMPIRES there as well as these flix that I shot for writer/director John Bowker: ABOMINATION: THE EVILMAKER 2, THE SEEKERS, HOUSEBOUND and TWISTED ILLUSIONS 2.

More updates soon.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Coming Soon...

A whole lotta crap has been going on since the end of July, but I am coming back shortly. Thanks to those who have been concerned. The new and improved Dr. Squid site goes live in a few days. Stay tuned...

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Back in a while...

Going to be away from the blog for a bit. Play nice while I'm away...

Friday, July 21, 2006

10-4, Good Buddy

I'm just about at 10 minutes on the NEW NEIGHBOR segment for TWISTED FATES. I'm at 9:59:02.

Talked to my wife about my concept for making a mummy costume. She seems to think it will work and will sew the underlying bodysuit in the next few weeks.

Fangoria Weekend of Horrors - San Jose, California, January 5-7. I'm going to try and go.

The editor who has had the footage for ALWAYS MIDNIGHT, including my TAINTED BLOOD short, for about a year, finally has given up on it. This after stalling the producer for about a year with all kinds of excuses, and now the guy is boasting about how during this time, he was really working on other projects that were "more worthy" of his efforts and how he made $10,000 working on a "real" movie. If the guy felt this project was so far beneath him and was doing other "worthy" projects anyway, I'm not sure why it took him so long to step aside. In any case, they producers are working on finding a new team to put the thing together. Once I have official news to report, I'll do so.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Eight is Great

Just passed 8 minutes of footage edited for the NEW NEIGHBOR segment of TWISTED FATES.

Hoping to get some work in on a couple of monster costumes on Monday.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

3 Minutes and Counting...

I have just about 3 minutes of the NEW NEIGHBOR segment for TWISTED FATES edited together. One step at a time...

Monday, July 10, 2006


Thanks to my buddy Victor ( I've gotten the ol' blog set up with an RSS feed and an Atom feed. I'm still a bit wobbly on all the terminology, but now those who want to subscribe to this humble blog may do so. Let the feeding begin!

Speaking of which I've been on vacation for a week or so and have been eating like a pig! In particular, I devoured a XXX burger and XXX root beer at XXX Root Beer in Issaquah, Washington ( Mmmmmmmmm... Due to all the travelling and eating, movie work has been slim, but I'm gearing back up to make some headway on all of the various projects I'm juggling. Why just last night I added some broken valentine's candy teeth to the mummy head for DR PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES.

More soon...

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Happy Birthday to Me...and Eric Spudic!

OK, I turned 39 yesterday so I have one year left to plan my mid-life crisis!

Got a free ice cream sundae at lunch thanks to my boss, my wife made me a dinner of lasagna and chocolate cake, I rocked out to some KISS cds and my son and I watched a b-movie about giant ants!

Life could be worse.

I share my birthday with Captain Kangaroo, Tobey Maquire, Hellen Keller, H. Ross Perot and Eric Spudic (!

Friday, June 23, 2006


Saw NACHO LIBRE the other night with my son and we laughed and laughed and laughed.

Got some stamps, stamped the Dr. Squid mailers mailed 100 of them out on Wednesday. Hope it generates some funding for a deal I'm trying to make.

Going to send a new master of TAINTED BLOOD to the editor for the ALWAYS MIDNIGHT anthology. He said the timing is good as he's hoping to get it wrapped up by the end of the summer.


Got Brett Kelly's new address so I could send off the check for the Dr. Squid ad in his upcoming BONESETTER comic book.

Have all of the NEW NEIGHBOR footage imported into the iMac. Have started trimming down to good takes and have first two shots dropped in to the timeline. Baby steps...

Created a photo collage web graphic for John (Pipedreams Entertainment) Bowker last night. Waiting to hear if he likes it.

Been a bit of delay in getting the news graphics put over the Link Masters footage, but should be ready in a few weeks.

Have gotten myself involved with a zine cooperative thing called SPAZ. Have to get 4 pages together to contribute, then a central guy assembles everyone's contributions, prints it up as a magazine and sends it out to everyone. Kind of like an APA I guess, but I'm woefully unfamiliar with a lot of zine terminology and history - I just make make 'em. My buddies Mike Hegg and Robert Sumner are the men behind it so I had to take them up on their invitation. I see it as a way to ease into getting a full issue of Dr. Squid published by the end of the year.

More later...

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Time Flies

Wow - it's been a couple of weeks since my last post.

Never did get back to the mummy outfit. Hope springs eternal - there's always this weekend!

Finally got that Dr. Squid mailer printed up, then folded. Distilled my mailing list down, printed labels and labelled the mailers. Now I need to get some stamps and get 'em off in the mail.

Got a back-up mater of TAINTED BLOOD made, trashed the files from my computer and just finished importing all of Ron Ford's footage for the "new neighbor" segment of TWISTED FATES. Going to get that cut, exported to master & back-up tapes, then move on to DEADLY PREMONITIONS.

Never managed to get going on the 14-day screenplay contest, however, I did talk to my wife about one sci-fi movie idea I'd had rolling around in my head for a while, but had trouble getting from the big plot twist to the ending I wanted. As usual, she made the perfect suggestion which then made the path to the ending logical and smooth and now I can't wait to start writing it!!

Ordered SASQUATCH HORROR COLLECTION the other day and told my wife that can be her birthday present to me. I'll post more about why I ordered it later...

Gotta run.

Monday, May 29, 2006

Long Weekend

As usual I didn't get as much done as I would have liked this weekend, but did make some progress on a few fronts.

I researched and sent out interview questions to four people for's DARK GALLERY. Have one response back so far and one from earlier in the month. Hope to get at least 2 if not 4 more sets of questions sent out tonight or tomorrow.

I designed a Dr. Squid ad for THE BONSETTER comic book that Brett Kelly is self-publishing this summmer.

Made some VHS dubs of Zombie Love Slave. Hope to package up tonight so I can mail them tomorrow.

I worked on the mummy head for DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES. Basically built-up the area around a few spots where I will use white elastic to attach the jaw to the head. It will all be covered with "mummy wrappings" so I don't need to worry about hiding the elastic. Hope to glue on a bunch of peanuts or something for the teeth tonight...

Almost done with the Dr. Squid mailer.

Finally had time to work on the second half of TAINTED BLOOD tonight. Fixed some mis-aligned sound clips and added back in a few fade-outs that had disappeared when I transferred the files from the old computer to the new one. I am thrilled to death because I managed to get each part to export to a MiniDV master tape without any stutters, glitches, sound drop-outs or anything! After I make a back-up master tape, I'm going to try and edit together the "New Neighbor" segment for TWISTED FATES. Poor Ron Ford has been waiting since 2003 to see this segment, which he directed and stars in, put together. Once that's together, I'll move back to DEADLY PREMONITIONS. Knock on wood.

All this plus saw a bit of a friend's Karaoke show and saw THE HUMAN GENOME PROJECT ( play in a local bar. They did the soundtrack to DECRYPTER, which I played a tiny role in. I also went to a friend's son's 5th birthday party (cosmic bowling!), mowed the lawn, trimmed some trees, watched FIRST BLOOD on AMC, dug the latest episode of SUPERGROUP on VH1, finished watching PARADIES LOST: CHILD MURDERS AT ROBIN HOOD, and watched ZONTAR THE THING FROM VENUS and THE EYE CREATURES!

I mentioned this book to Tim Shrum (of the LOST IN SCHLOCK site) the other day.

It's from 1976 and I think I got it from the Bookmobile that came to Fleetwood Elementary School in scenic Mt. Laurel, New Jersey. Either that or I ordered it through the Scholastic Book Club. I think I'd like to try doing my son up as some of these monsters this summer. We'll see if it works out...

Gotta go and see how much more I can get done before getting to bed.

Thursday, May 25, 2006


They were cleaning things out at work today and I scored several large cardboard tubes that I can use for the spaceship/spacestation set I eventually plan to build in my garage for the VIDEODRONE segment of TWISTED FATES. Two of the tubes may be too tall to fit in my car! But the price was right: FREE!

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Inch by Inch

Managed to hook up the cables correctly and made 2 cast copies of ZOMBIE LOVE SLAVE tonight.

Also finally wrote up the WELCOME SISTER segment of TWISTED FATES in a script format.

Movie Music

Here's the tape sleeve.

Your Strange Technology Frightens Me!

So I added some trailers to the ZOMBIE LOVE SLAVE dub I made the other night, hooked two VCRs together and made a cast copy...or so I thought. When I checked the copy, I found that I'd just recorded an hour of TV snow! Aaarrgh. Will have to check all my connections, cables and settings and try again tonight.

Planning on getting another Dr. Squid sale flier mailed out this week. Last night I finished the design for an audio cassette sleeve for BEAUTY AND THE EYEBALL (you'll understand once I post the cover image) which will be a collection of songs I made for UNDERBELLY plus a bunch of unused tracks and experimental stuff.

Hope to post a few pics of the mummy costume progress in a day or two.

I think I'm going to try and write a screenplay in 14 days. There is a competition going on - details at - but I think rather than officially join, I'm just going to use it as a challenge to myself to get one of my many scripts to a first draft stage. I just counted and I literally have 15 ideas right now - some are only concepts, some are collections of notes and sketches, a few are scripts I've written anywhere from 10 to 30 pages on. The competition is June 3-17, so I guess I have a little over a week to decide what I'm going to tackle.

More news soon...

Monday, May 22, 2006


Bought a firewire cable the other night with the correct connectors to hook my old iMac and my new iMac together to get the TAINTED BLOOD movie project off of the old computer and onto the new one. A few audio files were missing and moved when I opened the files into the new version of iMovie, but fixed part one and hope to fix part two this week sometime. Then hope it all outputs to tape without any hiccups.

I think the VCR that is a part of my 3/4" editing set-up is going south. Damn.

I managed to get a decent miniDV dub of ZOMBIE LOVE SLAVE made and plan to start making some VHS copies for the cast soon.

Worked a bit with the four-track audio recorder this weekend. I had an old tape of a song that some friends and I recorded about 10 year ago (holy crap time flies!). It was just drums, guitar and keyboards, though and the keyboards were rather hard to hear (it was just recorded with the built-in microphone on an old tape recorder sitting in the center of the room). Now all these years later, I added a bass track (using my keyboard) plus doubled the hard-to-hear keyboard track and topped it of with a bright shiny new keyboard track. Snazzy.

Don't forget:

Hope to have some better progress reports on stuff later this week...

Sunday, May 07, 2006

That's a Wrap

Shot the remaining two scenes for DEADLY PREMONITIONS today, in a little town about 40 minutes north in the bar at a Chinese restaurant. Robert J. Olin set up the location and cast his co-star and all the extras. What a guy! Here are some pics:

Monday, May 01, 2006

Sounding Off

Well, the weekend was nearly a complete washout for movie work due to a whole bunch of home and family junk that cropped up.

About 10:30 Sunday night, I did manage to get to something I've been trying to get to since December. With some upgraded software I was finally able to fix the audio glitches in the TAINTED BLOOD short. Woo hoo! Actually, last I heard the editor still hadn't finished putting the anthology together that TAINTED BLOOD will be a part of, so I might see if I can send them this fixed-up version to include instead.

Scheduled to shoot Robert J. Olin's remaining DEADLY PREMONITIONS scenes this Sunday. Hoping is all goes well.

More later...

Friday, April 28, 2006

Link Masters...SENT!

I finally got the Link Masters anchorman footage sent off yesterday to my buddy Eric who is going to put some newsy graphics on top of it.

Contacted an actress about a role in TWISTED FATES. She got back to me with some questions that I need to research the answers to...

Hoping to work more on the mummy costume this weekend. We'll see...

Thursday, April 20, 2006

No Dough Fango No Go

Well, I finally came to my senses the other day after running the numbers on driving vs. flying down to Burbank, CA for the Fangoria Weekend of Horrors and the bottom line is: I just can't afford it right now. I had grand plans back in January to save up for it, but a few family things cropped up that I had to use the money for and I couldn't just charge the whole trip on a credit card as I'm in the midst of trying to pay them off!

So, it will have to wait for another year.


In other news, Tarpo may rise again - the styrofoam & plastic tarp creature that I deemed a bit too goofy-looking for DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES may star in a short my son and I brainstormed about the other day. It will be just something fun for he and I to do together, but I may throw it onto a future release as an extra or something.

Lots to do...

Monday, April 10, 2006

Paper Mache Madness

Here's a few screen caps from a few weeks ago of the paper mache work I did with my son on a skull-ish looking mummy head for the DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES project.

I started with some cardboard strips, which I sized around my head and taped together with packing tape. I only had small water balloons on hand, so I blew up a bunch and stuffed them inside the form to give it some strength.

Note the straws which are forming the basis for the brow and the nose

Paper mache is fun!

And messy!

Here it is after the first few layers, which gave me a fairly solid base to start adding more elements on to.

Here's the next day - eye sockets, bridge of the nose, brow, etc. are taking shape. Just out of view is a seperate jaw piece that I'll eventually attach.

That's it for now. Eventually thiswill be painted and details with all kinds of lumpy junk to make it look rotten, then wrapped with a lot of "mummy wrappings."

Sunday, April 09, 2006

DP Logging Finished

FInished scene-logging all of the DEADLY PREMONITIONS footage I have shot so far tonight. Also went through and made note of scenes/segments I want to slo-mo. Plan to import those bits into iMovie, slo-no and export back to tape before bumping everything to the old editing system.

Got a voicemail from Robert J. Olin the other day - he's got some time and found an actress interested in playing a bit part for two remaining scenes for DEADLY PREMONITIONS. Not only that, he found a Chinese restaurant we can shoot at. I went over the scenes today and fine-tuned them a bit and e-mailed them to Robert. I plan to call him tomorrow and see when we can schedule the shoot.

Lots of family stuff over the weekend, so that's all the movie progress to report.

Bit by bit...

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Spring Break

I took last week off to be with my son over Spring Break and I must say we had a pretty good time.

We worked together on a paper mache' head for a segment of DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES. It's a skull-ish-looking thing - I shot a bit of video and hope to post a few video captures when I have time.

I've spent many hours scene-logging DEADLY PREMONITIONS footage. Even though the project was kind of slapped-together, I've been thrilled with the great performances from everyone involved. If you haven't already, check out all the pics at

I shot footage of my friend Mike as news anchor "Link Masters" for DEADLY PREMONITIONS and DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES, when I visited him in Washington State a couple weekends back. I have someone lined up to take that footage and add some news graphics and stuff to it.

I put up a shelf in the office to hold more videotapes. I've got the whole office torn apart and can hardly walk around in there, but am getting it better organized bit by bit.

I sold a few magazines so far from my stuff for sale page (

My buddy John Bowker called to remind me that it's less than 2 months until the Fangoria Weekend of Horrors in Burbank, California! Time to look in the couch cushions and see if I can't find a couple hundred dollars...

I managed to get four articles together for DARK GALLERY over at, and actually have one ready to go already for next month.

Bizarre and crazy things happening with the vampire segment of DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES. Can't talk about it right now, but am starting to chronicle the whole affair to post once it's all over. Life is stranger than fiction.

More later...

Wednesday, March 22, 2006


Scene logging DEADLY PREMONITIONS bit by bit, trying to do at least 15 minutes' worth each evening. Baby steps...

Heading up to Seattle area this weekend and plan to shoot Link Masters newscaster footage for DEADLY PREMONITIONS and DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES.

Have some vacation days next week and hope to make more progress on mummy story, mummy costume and DEADLY PREMONITIONS scene log. We'll see...

Holy crap, my son is 9 years old today! I decorated his cake with Jedi Knight Kit Fisto for his party last Saturday. Here's a pic.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Tom and Tom

The movie posters/comics/magazines/videos for sale page is up at:

Last night I got a call from Tough Tom Stedham from Alabama - he was checking up on DEADLY PREMONITIONS and it just so happened that earlier in the day I'd made plans to shoot Tom Shaffer's remaining two scenes that night. Tom (Shaffer) showed up about 9:30 and we shot a bit up in my office and down in the garage. I needed Tom to be really worked up as his character had just found his girlfriend murdered and he did a great job. I can't wait to start putting this thing together!

Tom has found a couple of actresses who are interested in being in some of his short movies. I need to check them out and see if they might be interested in a TWISTED FATES role...

Sad news around Dr. Squid's lab - my son's fish died last week. It was his first pet, bought when he was in first grade, so it was quite a tragedy. "Oshin" is now buried in the backyard with a little tombstone. He will be missed.

I went with my BLOODSUCKING REDNECK VAMPIRES partner Mike Hegg to the Portland Comic Book show last Sunday. Talked with Brinke Stevens a little bit and picked up a few DVDs from her. Also picked up a DVD of the BATMAN: DEAD END fanfilm, along with several PREDATOR fan films. Cool stuff. Talked to Mike about my desire to get an issue of Dr. Squid out this year. He'd previously said he had the itch to do some publishing - I might see if I can talk him into writing something for me...

More later...

Monday, February 20, 2006

Slow Progress...

Worked on the movie posters for sale webpage - need to finish up and post, then send out a Dr. Squid Lab Report e-mail to get the word out to folks.

A bunch of family stuff came up over the weekend and I had to cancel my shoot with Tom Shaffer for DEADLY PREMONITIONS. Good news is I cleaned up a lot of my office intending to shoot in there - if I can manage to keep it somewhat cleared out it will be ready when I can reschedule with Tom.

Still working on compiling all of my movie-related "to do" lists into one list, adding what I need to, then prioritizing and attacking everything.

Saw Mike Potter AKA newscaster Link Masters (from VAMPIRISA'S VELVET VAULT OF HORROR and ZOMBIE LOVE SLAVE) on Saturday. Plan to visit him up in the Seattle area in late March and shoot his news bits for DEADLY PREMONITIONS and DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES.

Right now, though, need to get several Dark Gallery interview e-mails sent out so I'm not scrambling at the end of the month to get them together for March....

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Gears Slowly Starting Up Again...

Two orders for DVDs and zines have come in so far from the Dr. Squid mailing I did several weeks back. Not enough to pay for the whole mailing yet, but I'm hoping a couple more come in.

I have had a stash of movie posters for years that I finally took digital pictures of several months ago. Need to get those priced and listed on the next mailer and see if I can't sell a few to help fund all these movie projects.

Just mailed off a package to someone today who will be shooting a vampire segment for the DR. PUDDING'S MONSTER FILES project. So, for those keeping score, UNDERBUG is all shot, DONNA THE NURSE (need to think of a new title for that segment) is all shot, TREESPIRIT is out to a director to shoot, as is the VAMPIRE segment.

I've searched high and low and cannot find the scene log I started for DEADLY PREMONITIONS, so finally decided last night I'd just start over. Just as well as I think I'd forgotten to note good bits for a bloopers segment, which I might as well grab at the same time I'm grabbing good takes.

Tentatively have shooting scheduled with Tom Shaffer on Feb. 20 to finish up his scenes for DEADLY PREMONITIONS.

Asked a b-movie actress if she'd be game to play a role in one of the TWISTED FATES segments, but she said she "really doesn't do that type of work anymore." Oh well. On to the next one.

I've been asked to write a zombie script for a low-budget filmaker in Canada. Spent my lunch hour the other day writing notes. Hope to get an outline nailed down by the weekend.

More to come...

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Little Bit O' Work

A new Producer has come on board TWISTED FATES through the "Producers Package" deal: Tony Masiello of!

Spent some time the other night fine-tuning a list of scenes to shoot and things to do for moving ahead with DEADLY PREMONITIONS.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Fuck You, Andrew "Linguica" Stine

Fuck you, Andrew "Linguica" Stine.

Here's some of what this "reviewer" had to say on By the way, BLOODSUCKING REDNECK VAMPIRES got quite off easy compared to many other flicks this guy has written about.

"I don't even particularly like horror movies."

That's a really great background to have for writing reviews of horror movies, Andrew.

"BLOODSUCKING REDNECK VAMPIRES" is not the worst horror film I have been forced to watch thus far, but this is about as much of a consolation as being told that my newly contracted thyroid cancer isn't a concern because I'll be dead of ebola within a week.

If we could only be so lucky! Andrew, you tease.

The name "BLOODSUCKING REDNECK VAMPIRES" immediately bodes poorly for the work..."Redneck Vampires" would have sufficed for this movie's title, and even "Bloodsucking Rednecks" could be considered adequately descriptive in a pinch.

The title was given to us by the film's distributor, who hired us to make it.

But by extending the title to "BLOODSUCKING RECNECK VAMPIRES," the film's makers are doing nothing more than prolong my embarrassment when my roommate wanders through the room and asks what the fuck I am watching.

Let me get this straight:

  • You don't like horror movies
  • You seem to hate most of what you review with such passion that you spend hours writing reviews that brutally rip them to shreads
  • You are embarassed when your roommate walks by and sees what you are watching

Why exactly do you continue to do this?

The movie opens at some sort of house party where a chubby vampirella sips on a snifter of what I assume to be blood.

Well, it's supposed to be wine, but here is the "chubby" actress you referred to.

Oh yeah, chub city, dude.

The vampirella rolls her eyes and spits out some hackneyed dialogue...

And good luck with your novel, Andrew.

He eventually gets home and collapses on a couch. I assume it's his home, although one of the many lessons about white trash this movie has taught he is that hicks live in a Shaker-esque communal society where letting yourself into other people's houses and sleeping in their beds is as common an occurrence as, say, sex with siblings.

When in this movie do people let themselves into other people's houses and sleep in their beds? Without permission or knowledge, as you imply, that is - admitedly there is a sleepover scene, but everyone involved knows they're sleeping over.

Get it, because that's all hicks do, is have sex with their brothers and/or sisters! Man, I am on fire today.

Then why haven't you burned to death, yet?! And what about the thyroid cancer and the ebola? You keep threatening to die, but yet you are still here writing reviews!

The movie cuts to another house where a girl who doesn't look a day over fourteen...

Just for the record, she was 16...and she had her Mom's permission to be in the movie.

While the image of a semi-sentient mound of flab sitting on a vampire's horribly crushed skull seared itself into my retinas I was too busy ripping the top off the DVD player and vomiting upon the electronics inside to even consider finishing the rest of the movie.

What? You didn't even finish the movie? Andrew "Linguica" Stine, you are a fucking prick! I'm sure that folks seeking out reviews to help them decide if they want to buy or rent a particular movie really just think to themselves, "You know what would be useful? A review by someone who didn't bother to actually watch the whole movie. Now that would be something I could rely on to make an informed decision. Oh, and it would be even better if he reviewed the genre of movies that he professed to not even like in the first place."

"Reviewing" movies without watching the whole thing is a cop out, you dick.

So this all may seem trivial thus far, the ramblings of some dork who thinks he can be clever and funny by ripping on other folks.

To get a better idea of what an asshole Andrew Stine is consider this: he wrote a "review" of a recent low-budget horror flick, saying, "This is the worst movie I have ever seen," calling it "utterly devoid of merit on any level imaginable," "cinematic bullshit" with a "worthless plot" and "worthless characters." He went on to call the writer/director/actor "hideously ugly," "amazingly unattractive," "an idiot,"and "a disgusting oaf." Andrew even made fun of the production company's name.

Fine. He hated the flick and thinks the guy who made it is unattractive. Everyone has a right to their opinions.

Then Andrew e-mails the writer/director/actor to give him the link to his "review."

What a jerk!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

El Cheapo Camera Prop

I promised a few folks I'd post pictures of a camera prop I made so here it is. I'm having someone shoot some footage for me and it involves a semi-professional photographer character. The person shooting said they didn't have a fancy camera so I figured I'd make a fake one to send them and it would look good enough on video.

So, I started with a cheapo film camera (A) I got at the Dollar Tree.

Yes, it was $1.00.

In hindsight, I couldn've started with just a rectangular box. I had gone to the store hoping to find a toy camera and was about to give up after not finding one, then saw these real cameras and for some reason figured I'd get it and build on to it.

For the flash, I used a pancake syrup container (B) - in the photo, you are seeing the bottom of it: the peel-off lid was on the backside. It was attached with some strips of duct tape and some model glue.

For kind of a handle/battery pack kind of thingee, I used a small plastic box (C) that used to hold the suntanning goggles that "Tulsa" from BLOODSUCKING REDNECK VAMPIRES wore. This was just attached with duct tape.

The lens was built up with some circular plastic rings leftover from some of my son's toys (D). Not sure what exact toys they are from, but you know when you get plastic models and the small parts come on a kind of plastic grid and you wiggle and snap off the small parts? Well these rings had small parts on them and they'd been wiggled and snapped off. Anyhow, I put three of them together with duct tape, then taped the whole thing onto the front of the camera.

I painted the whole thing with a few coats of black latex paint - the thicknes of the paint actualy helped to hide some of the seams and tape edges. Then I painted the whole thing with flat black spray paint. Why flat? Just what I had on hand.

I'd taped off a rectangle for the "flashbulb" but when I peeled the gaffer's tape I'd used of, it left a bunch of glue behind. Not much I could do about it, so I just left it.

I cut up a rectangular piece and a round piece of clear plastic from some packaging from one of my son's toys. I used model glue to put the rectangular piece over the "flashbulb" and the round piece over the lens area. The model glue dried clear. My hope is that light will reflect of of these plastic pieces and push the illusion further on video.

The final touches were using a liquid paper pen, black marker and red marker to make some little dots, squares and such on the camera. I'm hoping that the lines and stuff on the lens look like all those focus marks on a real camera. You can see the lines better in the photo below, but when I took this photo, the flash really shows the fakeness of this thing. Again, on video, while being held by someone, with lights reflecting off of it, it should fool the audience.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Dark Days

It's been a little over a week since I got a phone call from my mom telling me that my dad had a heart attack. He went to the hospital, had several hours of surgery and is thankfully home recovering. I was sick all last week with some sort of cold/flu/cough thing. My grandmother's funeral was about a month ago. I've been wrestling with computer problems for what seems like 2 weeks now. I'm trying to lose weight so not enjoying food as much as I did last year. Haven't slept well in a while.

Hope to report some fun movie-related stuff sometime soon.

Tell your loved ones you love them.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

New Year's Resolutions 2006

As I mostly stick to movie-related stuff on this blog, I'll stick mostly to movie-related resolutions for 2006.


2) Publish an issue of Dr. Squid

3) Go to the June Fango Con in Burbank

4) Finish my CREATURE FROM BEYOND script as well as at least one of the other scripts I have half-started all over the place

I've got other hopes for the year, including losing 50 pounds, paying off my credit cards, and other stuff, but if I can manage the above 4, my movie-making side will feel pretty good.

- Joe
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